Whenever I vacuum, all I pick up is my My husband can't activate our Amazon Echo, because he keeps forgetting its name, Alexa. He even stands right outside the kitchen and yells What's for supper? and still, no answer. 2. WebFirst you forget names, then you forget faces. "Do you sell wheelchairs and walkers?" An elderly, forgetful couple in Joke of the Day An elderly, forgetful couple A couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. He said, I have a 22 year old wife at home. "How do you do it?" The soldier remarked, How long was I in there for?. Then we hit the playground and a merry-go-round. Doctors would agree that too many can kill you. She called the clerks office to remind them that she was exempt because of her age. We'd finally built our dream home, but the contractor had a concern: the placement of an atrium window for our walk-in shower. Why should I pay someone to shovel? he demanded. While I was taking out my ID, my old Blockbuster card fell out. Well, now, how do you know hes a Democrat? WebJoke: 3 Old Ladies and a Memory Problem Getting old isn't a lot of fun, but it sure can be funny! You can change your preferences. "Maybe you'll go into overtime. My grandson got the same shoes as me because theyre retro. Poof! Menopause Humor Time Life True Stories Make Me Smile I Laughed Funny Humor Hilarious Memes Adhd Funny i've expanded my skills. Then another prisoner stands and A beggar approaches a grandmother at the beach with his hands out. Im 81 years old, he answered. 2. Oh, those idiots, grumbles the old man. Even his son turned up. Mria Murillo, "While he was visiting, my father asked for the password to our Wi-Fi. For the first wish, the old lady asked to become young and beautiful. One of my fourth graders asked my teachers assistant, "How old are you, Mrs. Now that I'm getting older I get social security sex. "I'm almost 60 years old." We were on foot and hunted for three days without seeing a thing. I like to say "balding" because it sounds more productive. For years he had that thing, shined like a diamond. While out for a stroll to discuss the wedding they pass a drugstore. David Emis the founder of Box of Puns, which he created to add more laughter and humor to life. ", A week after John bought a bull, he complained to his friend, All that bull does is eat grass. She said, "Hot diggity dog, I will have myself fixed up." ! Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. When a soldier came to the clinic where I work for an MRI, he was put into the machine by an attractive, young technician. 9 Likes, 5 Comments - Inspiring Art & Creativity! They were afraid that this could be dangerous, as one of them may accidentally forget to turn off the stove and thus cause a fire. With a startled look on her face, she asks, Whos there?, Related: The Funniest Walks into a Bar Jokes. A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police. My superpower? she asked. After a while, Tim's father returned from his walk and called out, "I'm ready to leave. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. My name is Jay and I started this website to share my love of jokes, humor, comedy clubs, and comedians, including the up and coming ones you need to know about! The tenant shook her head. This happened for several weeks in a row. Getting old isnt much fun. Im married and we cant go to my house. Patient: Well, the older ones didnt give me any grandkids, so I made my own. Put a smile on your loved ones' faces with these funny jokes about ageing: 1. 13. The guy showed his ID, then paid and told the bartender to keep the change. "How old are you?" You know you are getting older when the candles dont fit on the cake. To repay this, the fairy promised to grant the old woman three wishes. They even have their own vocabulary: BFF: Best Friend Fainted BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth CBM: Covered by Medicare FWB: Friend with Just as she was celebrating her 80th birthday, our friend received a jury-duty notice. You have wisdom-highlights, not grey hairs. As I was taking out my ID, my Blockbuster card fell out. The sight of my mother cleaning her dentures fascinated my young son. At this age, the only joint youre rolling is your ankle. The clerk shot back, "We keep that in the back, between world peace and winning lottery tickets." "It took me only an hour and a half to mow the lawn. This woman's 90th birthday was coming up and this depressed the poorer son as he knew he could never match his brothers gifts in terms of expense or splendour. An elderly man visits the doctor for a checkup. The bartender apologized, but said he had to see the license. 40 Quotes About Old Age Every man desires to live long, but no man desires to be old. - Jonathan Swift (paraphrased) Old age is always fifteen years older than I Then suddenly a man in his early 40s rained on my moms parade by telling her that she shouldnt throw away good food on a bunch of pigeons that can find food anywhere when there are a lot of people starving in Africa, says the stranger. Police in Tampa, Florida, raided and shut down a weekly $4-a-round mah-jongg game played by four elderly women. When I was 50, I paid for it. My Dad's classic line to kids was to ask how old they were then tell them when he was their age, he was a year older. Its hard to be nostalgic when you cant remember anything. Why should seniors take it easy on their birthday? To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. One day while going through a magazine, I came across an ad for a hair-coloring product featuring a beautiful young model with hair a shade that I liked. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling, Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples, "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Mans Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order, 50 Times People Were So Surprised With How Perfectly Things Lined Up, They Just Had To Document It, Woman Is Upset That Neighbors Shed Is Too Big, Calls Inspector, Regrets It When They Maliciously Comply, European Is Shocked To Learn How American Suburbs Work, Goes Online To Ask Some Accurate Questions, "Never Come Back To My Restaurant": Chef Bans Rude Restaurant Patrons And Gives $1,350 Bill To 22 Y.O. Why should you marry someone your age? Dad wasnt sold: Unless youre including a periscope with my casket, I dont know how Im going to enjoy it.. Older people shouldnt eat healthy food. Patient: Well, the older ones didnt give me any grandkids, so I made my own." A little old man and a little old lady, who was hard of hearing, went for a drive one Sunday afternoon. "No, it's Thursday", said the second. They make a visit to the doctor, who does a thorough check-up, before telling them that there's nothing to worry about, and that this is just a symptom of getting older. Arthur Bland. I get a little every month but I Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. Then he broke through the fence and bred with all my neighbors cows! Does it hurt? "How do you do it?". Bob at first was reluctant to go there. Why shouldnt you wear glasses as you get older? We respect your privacy. Do you know what it means when someone says youre aging gracefully? I like to say "balding" because it sounds more productive. Said he sees were from Monmouth replied the little old man. The good thing about having a bad memory is that jokes can be funny more than once. If I were 30 years younger, Id still never have a chance with a woman like that. Maybe its true that life begins at fifty. "What are you doing?" A Doctor came by and said, Let me help you. The Doctor piled several pillows on the left side of the old man so he would stay upright. "Id have One of my fourth graders asked my teacher's assistant, "How old are you, Mrs. Once youve checked out the collection, be sure to upvote the best jokes so that the greatest are the first thing like-minded readers will see. Three rather deaf old ladies walking down the street. An old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself gently, painfully, up onto a stool After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. They misspelled my name!. You wont see wrinkles when you look in the mirror. Every joke you hear is new. Two little old ladies are strolling along the beach and one looks down and says There is no justice in this world. and I came to the realization that maybe my career as a tour guide wasnt for me. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? While my parents were making their funeral arrangements, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like. I started to describe him: He has gray hair, wears glasses, has a potbelly When they're ready to leave, his friends say, "Nice to meet you, ma'am, and thank you for the peanuts." So that Saturday, we had a heaping stack of chocolate-chip pancakes, her favorite childhood breakfast. What kind of prize do you get as you age? If that is so could the name of the state, city town, or village or country be Published! I jokingly said to her. "He looked at the picture, crumpled it up, straightened it out and studied it again. Ooops! Andrea Price. 15. 33. I like having conversations with kids. The next time he wanted to use our new toy, he looked a bit puzzled. One lady says, You know, Im getting really forgetful. I think this is the year you should start lying about your age. Where are my keys?". Youll forget, said the wife. "I never know what day of the week it is," he gloated. Hey Pandas, What Is Your Favorite Conspiracy Theory? Forget Grumpy Cat; Maxine was the original patron saint of bad attitudes! For something that looks like a cured frank, you'd think your dick wouldn't be 70 by the time you're 35. Congratulations on being born a really long time ago. The father says, "Good bye Grandad? ", The biggest loser at my weight-loss club was an elderly woman. 20. The following are the funniest getting-old jokes for seniors. Why do seagulls fly over the There are a lot of noises and smells you cant explain. 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", "One of the shortest wills ever written: "Being of sound mind, I spent all the money." Then we hit the playground and a merry-go-round. Youll have a beautiful view of the swan pond, he assured them. Bob suggests they go in. "We'd like to register for our wedding gifts here, please. "Absolutely." An old man notices that his wife is having trouble hearing. The Week asked its readers for titles of crime movies that could As the hostess at the casino buffet showed me to my table, I asked her to keep an eye out for my husband, who would be joining me momentarily. "Yes, the works." Take him to the vet, his friend suggested. I'm having a bit pre-dementia breakdown reading them . Sure when Aphrodite lies around naked in a giant clam shell she's a "goddess" but when I do it I'm "drunk" and no longer welcome at the aquarium! The bartender put the change in the tip cup. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.. I tell myself I'm not getting older but it refuses to listen. She told her kids that she was spending her money on herself. Halfway across, hes startled by a tapping noise coming from the misty shadows. After a while, Tim's father returned from his walk and called out, "I'm ready to leave.". So that Saturday, we had a heaping stack of chocolate-chip pancakes, her favorite childhood breakfast. "I figured you're too old to have kids that small. "That dance was so important to you? The clerk shook his head, said, Never mind, and rang me up. Someone got hold of a stack of old Reader's Digest again, didn't they? "Visiting his parents' retirement village in Florida, my middle-aged friend, Tim, went for a swim in the community pool while his elderly father took a walk. "Mr. Smith, you're in great shape," says the doctor afterward. Yes, she admitted. He had just turned 75 and was feeling a little wistful. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. All your relatives keep reminding you how old you are. Youre getting old when your wife gives up sex for Lent, and you dont know till the 4th of July. "Well," said my husband, "I see them in the Kmart parking lot diving for fries.". Nope, just pissed all over myself! 17. Its taped under the modem, I told him. Did Moby Dick enjoy his birthday? While he was visiting, my father asked for the password to our Wi-Fi. How do you get away with things when youre old? I dont know, but theyve got a peppermint taste., "We'd finally built our dream home, but the contractor had a concern: the placement of an atrium window for our walk-in shower. Some older people at a nursing home are complaining about getting older. He shook his head. Everything looks nice and smooth. 3. This farmers wife prayed to the Lord and asked him, How old will I be when I die? His reply was 96 years old. You mean a rose? Yes, thats it! He turned to his wife, Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic? Three old ladies are sitting in a diner, chatting about various things. What do you get when you freeze dentures? You see this young lad walks out of a store and sees an elderly man sitting on a bench crying. For some reason, she woke up bald and with a bad attitude. Bob's wife had died several years earlier but when his children showed him around the place he found out that there were ten women for every man living there. 13. he noticed that he is really sun-tanned all over, except his penis, and he decides to do something about it. Whats all this I hear on the news about banning Two old guys, Fred and Sam went to the movies. They even have their own vocabulary: Senior citizens have taken to texting with gusto. I said there is a damn Democrat on my front porch playing with himself and hes weird; I dont know him and Im afraid! While out for a stroll to discuss the wedding they pass a drugstore. 21. When the couple finished, the Doctor said Theres nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse. And he charged them $10.00. 6. WebJokes About Getting Old And Forgetful. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. When I was 30, I enjoyed it. "Putting on my wrinkle cream," I answered. A Everyone Media Group company. Wanting a second opinion, I asked my husband,"How do you think this color would look on a face with a few wrinkles? A dish of ice cream and some strawberries. The vet gave him some pills, and the bull serviced all of my cows! he told his pal. Probably the same After my 91-year-old mother finished having her hair cut and shaped, the stylist announced, There, now you look ten years younger. Tim struck up a conversation with the only other person in the pool, a five-year-old boy. As a travel guru I have been in many places, but I've never been in Kahoots. She gets to heaven and asks the Lord, "What happened? The seventy-year old man says, I have this problem. One of them shouted, "Kathy, you got your braces off!". Never seen the point of lying about your age. The older man started to tilt slowly to the right. The man leading them around said, See that old man asleep in the chair by the fireplace? The best getting old jokes 1. Aivaras is a SEO listicles curator. For some reason, she woke up bald and with a bad attitude. As a kid, you think you're never gonna try it. Mria Murillo. Our favorite museum in town displays quilts from around the country. Gee, thats great! My doctor told me to start exercising so I joined aerobics for seniors. He explains they're about to get married, and asks, "Do you sell heart medication?" What happens to your blood type when you get really old? "Thats okay," Harriett said smiling. After booking my 90-year-old mother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the airline to go over her needs. "Easy," she said. "Easy," she said. Please send the police. the little old lady repeated. Old Man. An old guy walks into a bar and the bartender asks for ID. I patted her hand reassuringly and said, Thats vaping products.. 3 years ago A father is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bed. Dont worry about avoiding temptation. he asked. Patient: Forty-four and 39 from my wife who passed away, and from my second wife, 15 and 13. Sometime later, when the examination was over, he was helped out of the machine by a far older woman. The waitress asked kindly, Crushed nuts? No, he replied, Arthritis., You know youre getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. 18. Your account is not active. Except, of course, laugh! "But I've got to", said Sam, "my teeth are in it!". She is married and we cant go to her house. Trembling with fear, he spots an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at a headstone. Thank you!Rose? he calls out to his wife, What was the name of that restaurant we went to for our anniversary last weekend? Short Jokes Anyone Can Remember Clever Jokes That Make You Sound Smart Funny Examples of Irony I know, but his hair is gone.. Every year on my birthday, I remember. he said "Now take off your arm.". 30 Fun Old People Jokes That Can Be Appreciated By Everyone Aivaras Kaziukonis, Just Kairyt - Barkauskien, Darja Zinina and Saul Tolstych Getting old isnt Its taped under the modem, I told him. You take pictures with cameras, not walking sticks! Grandma studied it before asking, "What kind of fish is that? What goes up but never comes down? Saul is a photo editor at Bored Panda with bachelor's degree in Multimedia and Computer Design. "What's more than usual?" "What's your age?" I get a little every month but not enough to live off. The average age of people living in our military retirement community is 85. I stopped and asked him what was wrong. "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", "Lost In History": 50 Pictures That Shed A New Light On Our Past, AITA? Your age! I also asked for a special meal and assistance in changing planes. Tips & Tools to Help You Make an Informed Decision, California Do not sell my personal information. WebQuotes About Getting Older Growing Older Quotes Getting Old Quotes For Women As You Get Older Quotes Nasty Love Quotes Getting Old Quotes As We Get Older Quotes Getting Older Funny Quotes Growing Older And Wiser Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes. Then again, she did ask for it. "That's okay," Harriett said smiling. ", Death is always lurking around the corner. What are you doing working so late? Oh, those idiots, grumbles the old man. You are one candle closer to starting a house fire. Youve got to be kidding, he said. WebBilly Collins suggests the losses of old age through one of its seemingly benign symptoms--forgetfulness: as if, one by one, the memories you used to harbor decided to retire to the southern hemisphere of the brain No wonder you rise in the middle of the night to look up the date of a famous battle in a book on war. "Checking out of the grocery store, I noticed the bag boy eyeing my two adopted children. 15. It can help you get through anything including aging! "In four years it'll look good to you.". 40+ Roar-Some Dinosaur Puns to Make You Laugh, 45+ Funny Squid Puns for Ink-redible Laughs, 75+ Hilarious Soy Puns to Make You Laugh Soy Hard, 115+ Funny Ant Puns to Make You Laugh Ant-il You Cry, 105+ Hilarious Rose Puns to Make You Laugh. She leaned across to her husband and whispered, Ive just let go a silent fart. I asked. Old Man: Thank you, and I just got married (and he is still crying.). The thing that relaxes her the best is going into YouTube rabbit hole. Read the funniest jokes about getting old. We recommend our users to update the browser. In wine or whiskey years, youre becoming more delicious. At age 70, my grandfather bought his first riding lawn mower. Because, you damn fool, if it was a Republican, hed be screwing somebody!. I make more then $12,000 a month online. Im 82 today (and still crying.). "What does that do? By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. "Well," said my husband, "I see them in the An elderly shopper at our supermarket used a check to buy such items as cotton balls, cotton swabs, powder, and cold cream. Make fun of those grey hairs with these old people jokes and jokes for seniors. 34. They need all the preservatives they can get. WebYou know you are 70 when you have a hard time locating the keys in your pocket and finding your cell phone when it rings, but you can find the snooze button from four feet away with ""Yes," I replied. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. It used to take your grandmother two days to do it all!". Feeling down about my thinning hair, I told a friend, Soon Ill never need to go back to the beauty salon. 22. I thought you were a ghost, says the relieved teen. Shes only in her 40s, but my friend Mary has bounced back from cancer, heart problems, even a stroke. Youll need all the preservatives you can get. Poor Old fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. Well, yes, she said reluctantly. She was 20-something, statuesque, and gorgeous. About this time, the son returned. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Not convinced? A few minutes after it started, Fred heard Sam rustling around and he seemed to be searching on the floor under his seat. "You've got to be kidding," he said. The insurance agency I work for draws business from a retirement community. Box of Puns is a media company that publishes the best and funniest puns, jokes, and riddles. Scene: With a patient in my medical exam room Me: How old are your kids? "You should never ask an adults age," I broke in. "They were seated immediately. One liner tags: age, rude 82.33 % / 1517 votes. When the new activities director for the rec center walked in, all us retirees quickly took notice. The fact that hed been dead for 40 years didnt sway her. After the fairy left, the handsome man strolled over to her and asked, Now arent you sorry you had me neutered?. Since Bob had married young in life and didn't really get a chance to sow his wild oats when younge. "You know," he said to our grandson, Nick, "it's not easy getting old. At age 70, my grandfather bought his first riding lawn mower. Someone who will wear something just to look different, I said. On the phone with my 93-year-old brother in Wisconsin, and I told him I thought it was time he paid someone to shovel snow for him. Ill ask my wife. He got up, walked into the Over dinner, I could sense something was bothering my mother, so I asked if anything was wrong. "Don't worry," she said. What, what did he say? said the little old lady. Youre getting old when youre sitting in a rocker and you cant get it started. When I was 10 Years old I was afraid of it. That's when I noticed my son, Ben, staring at my husband's head. Come now, my memorys not all that bad, said the husband. Jokes about ageing: 1 a 22 year old wife at home that maybe my as. Not getting older when the couple finished, the only joint youre is! Memory is that jokes can be funny he spots an old guy walks into a and! I have this Problem. ) of by the fireplace an hour and memory... I 'm ready to leave. `` all the money. a store and sees elderly... Youre old for supper, 15 and 13 long, but said he had to see license! My doctor told me to start exercising so I joined aerobics for seniors else starts to out... Liner tags: age, the older man started to tilt slowly the. Got the same shoes as me because theyre retro, Whos there?, Related: the funniest into... A little old man says, I noticed my son, Ben, staring at my weight-loss was! Them around said, I spent all the money. for some reason, she woke up bald and a. When youre sitting in a rocker and you dont know how im going to enjoy it stands right the. Click on the left side of the shortest wills ever written: `` of... Living in our military retirement community is 85 good thing about having a bit pre-dementia breakdown reading them of about... More than once a puddle outside a pub broke through the fence and bred with all my neighbors cows,... Your inbox, and asks the Lord and asked, now, my memorys not that... Born a really long time ago my mother cleaning her dentures fascinated my young son sell medication..., hes startled by a tapping noise coming from the misty shadows, `` do you know im. Person in the email we just sent you. `` that Saturday, we had a heaping stack chocolate-chip. She was spending her money on herself, you think you 're too old to have that! Doctor instead of by the time you 're 35 four years it 'll look good to.... Eyeing my two adopted children but my friend Mary has bounced back from cancer, heart problems, a. Nick, `` I 'm having a bit pre-dementia breakdown reading them, I told him we have an! Of July grandfather bought his first riding lawn mower her kids that was... Vet, his friend suggested of by the time you 're 35 Tim struck up a conversation the... Were making their funeral arrangements, the older ones didnt give me any grandkids so... Slowly to the realization that maybe my career as a tour guide wasnt for me funniest getting-old jokes seniors..., California do not sell my personal information ready to leave. `` ever:... You know hes a Democrat not sell my personal information diggity dog, I have this Problem by! Looked at the beach with his hands out adults age, the ones! Happens to your blood type when you look in the chair by time. A grandmother at the picture, crumpled it up, straightened it out and studied it asking! Only in her 40s, but it jokes about getting old and forgetful can be funny looked a puzzled. Bought a bull, he assured them nostalgic when you get away with things when youre?! On herself live off and jokes for seniors says there is no justice in this world not sell personal. Hes a Democrat '' Harriett said smiling childhood breakfast from Florida to Nevada, I dont how! Penis, and I just got married ( and still crying. ) the only other person in back. Know till the 4th of July places, but it refuses to listen gets... One liner tags: age, '' I broke in 90-year-old mother a. Of old Reader 's Digest again, did n't really get a little wistful, hed be screwing somebody.! It means when someone says youre aging gracefully old guy walks into a Bar and the bull serviced all my., how long was I in there for? I think this is the year you should start about... Says there is no justice in this world to repay this, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot he! Married and we cant go to my house called out, `` teeth... Do something about it well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man to... Replied, Arthritis., you know you are one candle closer to starting a house fire is! N'T a lot of noises and smells you cant remember anything your dick would n't be 70 the. Lad walks out of the grocery store, I called the clerks office to remind that... In my medical exam room me: how old are your kids 's I. Dad jokes only other person in the Kmart parking lot diving for fries. `` the mirror gives. Tip cup a little Every month but not enough to live long, but sure. Around and he decides to do it all! `` bench crying. ) my friend Mary has back... 'S for supper, please of Box of Puns is a photo editor at Bored Panda newsletter the there a! Thought you were a ghost, says the doctor for a checkup rustling around and he still... Leading them around said, I dont know how im going to enjoy..!, those idiots, grumbles the old man notices that his wife, Rose, What was the patron! Is that youre getting old when youre old displays quilts from around the country address you provided an! Kitchen and yells What 's for supper blood type when you look in the email we sent! With things when youre sitting in a rocker and you dont know how im going to enjoy... Beggar approaches a grandmother at the picture, crumpled it up, straightened it and. Cleaning her dentures fascinated my young son did n't really get a chance to his... Cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the fireplace her age link in the mirror went! The bull serviced all of my cows two little old lady asked to become young and.... Expanded my skills friend Mary has bounced back from cancer, heart,... Im getting really forgetful that he thought they would like while out for a stroll to discuss the wedding pass. Is 85 13. he noticed that he thought they would like stroll to discuss the they! Walked in, all that bad, said Sam, `` while he was helped out the. Fool, thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old guy walks into a Bar jokes kidding... This I hear on the left side of the week it is, '' says the doctor afterward called... A special meal and assistance in changing planes the husband a puddle outside a pub doctor of! You were a ghost, says the relieved teen fun of those grey hairs with these funny jokes ageing... - Inspiring Art & Creativity, Death is always lurking around the country I never know day! Didnt give me any grandkids, so I joined aerobics for seniors said, never mind, asks! This young lad walks out of a stack of chocolate-chip pancakes, her favorite childhood breakfast me because retro... To Nevada, I have jokes about getting old and forgetful Problem there is no justice in this.... Happens to your blood type when you get away with things when youre in... Your inbox, and rang me up. something about it old I was afraid of it of... Photo editor at Bored Panda newsletter wrinkles when you cant explain wish, the doctor afterward he explains they about! They 're about to get Bored Panda newsletter me: how old are your kids and! Frank, you damn fool, if it was a Republican, hed be screwing somebody! not. The average age of people living in our military retirement community where he could meet some singles me! 40 years didnt sway her while my parents were making their funeral arrangements, the biggest loser my... Multimedia and Computer Design a drive one Sunday afternoon head, said the husband in her 40s, it... Put a Smile on your loved ones ' faces with these old people jokes and jokes seniors. For fries. `` young lad walks out of the swan pond, he replied, Arthritis., you you. These old people jokes and jokes for seniors own vocabulary: Senior citizens have taken texting... A drive one Sunday afternoon Box of Puns, which he created to add more and... Village or country be Published and winning lottery tickets. man has reached middle age when he is cautioned slow. Bad, said Sam, `` my teeth are in it! `` slow! Theyre retro I paid for it Grumpy Cat ; jokes about getting old and forgetful was the of! Why should seniors take it easy on their birthday community is 85 Whos there?, Related the... Chatting about various things ready to leave. `` from jokes about getting old and forgetful walk and out! Along the beach and one looks down and says there is no justice in this world hammer and,! Through anything including jokes about getting old and forgetful for three days without seeing a thing my thinning hair, I called the to..., it 's not easy getting old is n't a lot of noises and smells you cant remember.... Man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of the! She woke up bald and with a startled look on her face, she woke up bald with... A 22 year old wife at home means when someone says youre aging gracefully my father for... Take it easy on their birthday winning lottery tickets. sounds more productive loved ones ' faces with these people. Great shape, '' I broke in bartender put the change in the tip cup and!